What is more romantic than expressing your love to someone? How about this: demonstrating your love to your bride or groom in your own words in front of all your loved ones on your wedding day! Couples who decide to write their own wedding vows may experience anxiety, writer’s block, or a slight combination of both in the weeks spent preparing their wedding vows. Understandably, considering wedding vows are often the most personal, intimate part of the wedding ceremony. This is your first opportunity in starting your new life together to express your feelings to one another, and to publicly express them before your family and friends as well. Here are some useful guidelines to ease your stress in brainstorming your vows!

To get some opening ideas to catch each other’s attention, the bride and groom can do some research of their own. Citing meaningful poems, movies, songs, and greeting cards, the bride and groom can easily develop an opening line or two, and elaborate on it for the duration of the vows. For example, from the hit movie Titanic, the quote, “You jump, I jump,” can be used as a wonderful attention catcher and opening. Try to use examples significant to your relationship: your first movie together, your first dance together, perhaps the poem or phrase written in the first birthday or anniversary card you gave or received. This strategy will be sure to inspire you while stirring happy memories of your relationship when it was brand new.

On this special wedding day, it is also very important to incorporate “Your Story”; where you met, when you fell in love, what you love about each other, what is the meaning of marriage is to both of you, and what your intentions are for your new life together. Consider asking yourself these questions to construct your vows. Your answers can very well be the foundation of the vows you share with your fiancé at the altar! This exercise can also aide the flow of the speech by linking one idea to the next.

As with any important piece of writing, you should always write a first draft before the copy is finalized and ready to go! A first draft can be a jumble of ideas, similar to a stream of consciousness. There is so much you could say about your husband or wife to be, so a first draft can help you to gather all of those ideas before you begin organizing them and giving your vows an ebb and flow. Another great way to prepare your vows is to practice reading them out loud a few times. If your words aren’t flowing correctly or if you struggle throughout your vows, this is the prime time to edit them and decide what may be more fitting.

One final piece of advice for preparing wedding vows is to always speak from the heart. The bride and groom should be completely honest with each other. It can be intimidating sharing such intimate feelings with your loved ones sitting before you, but you should ever be afraid to express how you feel about your bride or groom. You are each other’s support system from this point forward, and by publicly demonstrating your commitment and investment in him or her, you are showing the world, as well as your fiancé, that you are on their side through all the ups and downs from this point forward. Speak your mind, speak from the heart, and revel in this very special moment. Make every single word count!